Maybe I am just afraid...

“Such is the human being; when he is afraid, he sees enemies everywhere and thinks the only chance to stay alive is to exterminate them.” Beatrice – Rwandan Hutu Refugee reflecting on life in the camps in DRC.

I would struggle to find a more succinct way of explaining what fear does in our lives, it lies to our hearts, pulling on the survival instinct in all of us, the desire for self preservation at the cost of all else. I am fortunate enough to live in a time and place where I have borne and continue to bear witness to the result of lies that fear has set up in people's hearts, while also witnessing the miracle that can happen when someone understands that it is fear that drives hatred, and stands up to put fearful hearts at rest.

Fear seems to have managed to creep in to society, so that it is so prevalent that there is no corner of our lives and cultures that are not affected by it in some way. It has become a way of life for us in so many ways. We have become a people who are more easily defined and directed by our fears than our freedoms.

If perfect love drives out all fear, then could it be possible that the true opposite of love is not hate but fear, and it is the fear that plays on any number of other aspects of our lives (even positive things like self preservation) that eventually causes us to hate, as it drives us to preserve our lives, lifestyles, ideas and ideals and pull further and further away from anything that can cause those things to be removed. I am yet to see hate ever make any lasting, positive change in the world, but love...I have seen love conquer the conqueror. Because "...In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him..." (Orson Scott Card: Ender's Game)

If we could be brave enough to love unabashedly, we could be the people who in turn release those whom we fear from their own prisons. And who knows – perhaps we can also be known as people who turn the world upside down.

What would a world without fear look like? Can you imagine it? A world without fear of death, judgement, failure, pain or things that go bump in the night. How would it feel to know that people love what you do not because it is the best, but because it comes from you, and they love you?

Personally, there is nothing that tears at my soul more deeply than when I see fear in someone’s eyes, or watch as people respond to situations and circumstances out of fear (often without even knowing it). I have not completely won the battle over fear in my own life. Not by any means. But I live to fight the battle. For me, it is a worthwhile endeavor to spend my life in pursuit of how to love completely, and in so doing release those around me from fear.

Captured

I look in to the eyes of Love;
and am captured.
Iris to iris I find who I truly am.
Fought for with His dying breath.
Won by His unyielding life.
He takes my hand I become everything that I am;
and know the fullness of who I can be.
My worth read in His eyes of unabashed love
For me.
I am free.

He died to free me; rose so that I can rule, and pursues me so that He can hold my hand and whisper to my heart.

Being Human

What does it mean to be human?
What is it to live fully alive?

For me, to be human and to live fully alive, is to embark upon a disciplined adventure in recapturing the wonder of all of life. The struggle of humanity is to be fully who we are. We spend so much time trying to figure out who we should be that we can forget how to just be...

Being human is an experience that is so unique to each person. All of us with our own take on the shared joy and heartache that life brings. Sorrow, agony, loneliness, exhilaration, passion, joy, ecstasy - we all run the gambit of these emotions, but it is our experience and expression of those poignant moments in our lives which make our journey on this earth so unique to each individual.

With so much to experience in the short time that we have to spend on this planet, how can we not strive to embrace all that life has for us? To live in complete awareness of each joy, each sorrow...each moment. After all, moments are all that we have in which to experience what it is to be fully human, to be fully alive in the hands of a loving God.

There is no risk in Heaven - no battles to fight, no wars to be won. There is no need to have faith, or challenges to overcome. The only time in all of eternity that we get to exercise grit and determination, the only time where we get to be part of the fight, and can risk it all is now. It stands to reason then, that we need to live, taking hold of every moment, grasping at every opportunity and challenge.  Breathing in all that each and every moment has to offer us, because when our time is done it would be such a waste to say that we have more left to give, more we wish we could have done, more we could have changed in the world, more moments, more breaths, more appreciation and wonder at the perfect balance of nature that allows us to have life on this planet.

It can be so difficult to embrace the experience of being human, because we can get so caught up in the task of being human, that we become too myopically focused on ourselves and our issues and to-do lists that we forget to enjoy the broad sweeping beauty of each moment.

Perhaps the key challenge to being fully human is this: to be alive to each moment, while living for the the future eternal moment and bringing Heaven to earth. The challenge is to be who we are - the perfect combination of spirit and body, formed from the earth but breathed upon by the Spirit, living in and from two worlds at once; embracing the beauty and fragility of the one while pulling on the permanence and perfection of the other. To live exclusively from one arena would diminish who we are created to be. We are a wonder of creation. There is nothing else like us. We are human...and we are alive.